We girls at the organization are not devout or deeply religious, but we are involved in our local Protestant church whenever there are functions, events, bake-offs, or charitable work for the less fortunate. We do get inspiration from the good book and the events that are described in the Bible. (In fact, some of our favorite passages come from 1 Peter and Ephesians 5:22 – 5:24) You can look at some of our favorite quotes here at our official website.

Our greatest model for femininity begins with Eve. We believe that the symbolical meaning of woman being created from man’s rib is the foundation of the Stepford edict: Eve was created solely to be a helper to Adam, to keep him company so he would not be alone.

That Eve was seduced by the serpent to take that first bite, thus banishing both man and woman from the garden of Eden meant the weight of sin is on the woman’s shoulders. We were taught by the Stepford Men’s Organization that a deep sense of shame and contrition should be our identity as faithful wives to our husbands. Marriage is our second chance to do right by our men. Where Eve faltered, we will succeed.

One of our trademarks as girls of the Stepford Wives Organization is that we all have long hair. We also drew inspiration from the story of Simon of Pharisees inviting Jesus to dinner.

A woman in that town who lived a sinful life learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee’s house, so she came there with an alabaster jar of perfume. 38 As she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them. Luke 7:36-7:38 NIV

It’s not often that our husbands request us to wash their feet with our hair, but the symbolic gesture of having a lengthy mane to fulfill our lord’s wishes has always been greatly appreciated. After all, we took the first bite from that apple. As women, we have figuratively lived sinful lives. Cherishing the Stepford way of pleasing our men, being a helpmeet and attentive wives to them is our way of seeking redemption.

Quotes are difficult entities. Often taken out of context, they can be easily misconstrued as miniatures of extreme rhetoric. We looked over several books on quotations involving women and wives. Some quotations- while ridiculously misogynistic – have no reference to women at all. They could be in reference to men. (And if that were the case, why is it no longer an issue?) We have heard women’s groups complain about The Smiths’ “Bigmouth Strikes Again” as woman-hating. But the song is written by Morrissey, who retains ambiguity in his sexual preference. There’s no indication in the lyrics, furthermore, that he is referring to a woman. It could have been a male partner.

Still we at the organization love quotations for the very reason they are simple reductions that we can memorize and repeat to each other when we get together to exchange recipes and cleaning tips.

We also like to be fair. When we read some passages from one Islamic advice book that raised our eyebrows, Carolyn, my sister, went to great lengths to obtain the actual book. In this instance, Muhammad Imran’s Ideal Woman in Islam. We are not familiar with the religion, but in all fairness, the book, taken in its entirety, exhorts men to respect women, their wives, and cherish them. We think that’s a darling sentiment! Therefore, to take one or two sentences out of a 150 page book is a wee bit skewed. I’m sure people do that to our website www.stepfordwife.com / www.stepfordwives.org all the time.

You can’t control the internet, so here are our favorite quotes that we love to recite when the men are not around. Click on the link below to go to our page on our website, stepfordwife.com / stepforwives.org:

Marsha’s Drake’s The Submissive Wife is a short novel that expounds on the biblical teachings of Titus and Ephesians, primarily those involving a wife’s biblical submission to her husband. The novel is written in an easy to read format, documenting the days of one Martha Christian, a housewife / mother (of three boys), whose liberation from the home is awakened one day when she is called to duty as a smock lady at the local hospital.

After suffering an accident that puts her in a cast, things begin to go downhill, as Martha repeatedly defies her husband’s wishes for her to stay at home. To cure herself from this need for “self-expression,” she tries a number of remedies, anywhere from shopping herself out of a rut, to taking different jobs. Don’t let the title of the book fool you. It may be 170 pages, but it is 169 pages of a woman being everything but a submissive wife. One wonders many times along the way whether it is possible to be so at odds with the joys of homemaking. Martha continually quotes the scripture- even at one point to a teenage girl who has an aggressive career-oriented mother who is separating from the husband – but she herself then neglects following her biblical advice and goes back to rebelling. In that sense, it seems a little contrived.

Honestly, we girls at the Stepford Organization would have caved in at Chapter 1 and “quietly receive instruction with entire submissiveness” and obedience to our husbands’ wishes.

Needless to say, the moment finally arrives, but with a unique twist. It’s got a bit of everything: humor, emergencies, cuteness, a smattering of intellectual quotes, cheating, flirting bosses, break-ins, shoplifting, juvenile delinquency, all in a familial setting. So if you tend to wince at some of these situations, you may want to proceed with care. Pay attention to her boss outside if the domestic sphere – Drundle – who seems to be a dominating male figure which comes into competition with her husband’s.

1. Can I join this group

The Organization is made up of a group of women who physically know each other in real life, and live within close proximity of each other. It is NOT a virtual community where online members can join. The Organization is an online bulletin board for us to share our ideas, recipes, etiquette, philosophy, and way of conduct with other Stay-at-Home Mothers and Wives.

2. What is the politics of the organization

We encourage a broad range of views among our organization. There are women who have Women’s Studies B.A. from prestigious schools on the East Coast, to home-schooled ladies, and some with GEDs. Education is not a sign of prestige as we think no amount of intellectual powers can compare to one’s ability to please her husband. We have feminists who were active in the 70s and 80s, to ultra-conservative religious Republicans. At different point in our lives, we realized that staying at home and attending to and pleasing the head of the household was our main calling in life.

3. Where are you located.

Western Connecticut.

4. I’m a member of the transgender / crossdresser / bDsm community. Can we join your organization?

We can’t control who reads our website, or who pretends or fantasizes to live our way. While we think you should be free to live your life as long as you’re not hurting anyone, the answer is No. We feel if you live by the tenets of traditional marital obedience, there’s no need to stray into deviance and fringe behavior. We like normalcy and promote traditional, conservative values. We have never associated with any alternative lifestyle groups or gender-confused people, and we have little desire to.

5. What books do you recommend us to read

1. The Holy Bible
2. Fascinating Womanhood by Helen B. Andelin
3. Fascinating Girl by Helen B. Andelin (which was incorporated into certain editions of FW)
4. Man of Steel and Velvet: A Guide to Masculine Development by Aubrey Andelin
5. Being the Strong Man a Woman Wants: Timeless Wisdom on Being a Man by Elliot Katz
6. Wife Dressing: The Fine Art of Being a Well-Dressed Wife by Anne Fogarty and Rosemary Feitelberg
7. Stepford Wives by Ira Levin
8. Complete Book of Etiquette by Amy Vanderbilt
9. A History of the Wife by Marilyn Yalom
10. Happy Housewives: I Was a Whining, Miserable, Desperate Housewife–But I Finally Snapped Out of It…You Can, Too! by Darla Shine

6. Who are the members of the Organization?

There is Irene (that’s me) who, along with Pree, does most of the admin work and answers emails. My sister Carolyn, and then there is Stephanie, Clarissa, Blair, Liz, Sici (because she doesn’t like to be called Muff), Jane, Maddy and Connie.

6. Are you against feminism?

We are not. Feminism fought to gain equality, opportunity, legal rights, and most importantly, freedom for women. Like any idea, it was bound to be misread and appropriated by people who had their personal agenda to advance. In it’s original suffragist and workplace ideals, they succeeded in what they set out to do. As with any idea that seek to obtain opportunity however, freedom means we are equally free to accept feminists ideas as we are to reject them. We thank and applaud the women who have fought for our rights to make our own decisions. Now please allow us to make our own decisions and live by the choices we have made.

If you force us to live by your personal, egalitarian vision of utopia, then wouldn’t you would have repeated the very offense you charged men (and the patriarchal oppression) of committing?