Posts Tagged ‘etiquette’

Osmosis and the flood from the less concentrated into the more concentrated (by Carolyn Snowdon)

Friday, May 24th, 2013

Osmosis is a chemical terminology that means the tendency for a less concentrated solvent to move in and occupy the area with a more concentrated solvent.

I have noticed that the tendency of passing time is for areas of lesser substance to permeate those of greater substance, thereby diluting it, making it weak. This applies for culture, cultural behavior, cultural patterns, and the general way we carry and present ourselves. In fact, I would go so far as to say that the quality of products in the last 50 years have gone steadily downwards.

When it comes to the way we present themselves as women, osmosis is readily apparent. The weaker culture continues to permeate how we use to be.

Women today are loud, foul-mouthed, obnoxious, belligerent, violent, and unkempt. English has almost become a second language in the States. Is it any wonder that we have lost the vocabulary of femininity?

We need to return to the golden age of modesty, chastity, and willing deference and docility to our husbands and men.

That is the only way to push out the lesser, coarse elements that are constantly threatening to eradicate the way proper wives and women once were.

The Stepford Wife’s Dinner Table Manners

Tuesday, March 6th, 2012

Despite what people say about Stepford Wives being conformists to one accepted way of doing something, the girls in our organization do have our individual styles at our dinner table. Needless to say, the basic rules still apply: we never have dinner without our husbands present. But the similarity ends there.

Carolyn, my sister, always hovers over James while he eats. She continues serving his meal, freshening his drink and bussing the dishes back and forth until the courses are all served. After that, she sits down and listens to how his day went.

I’m a little different. I sit with an empty plate in front of me while Charles eats: I don’t get up until he needs something. Whatever Charles doesn’t finish, he forks his leftovers to my empty plate and after I get him his next course, I eat whatever he doesn’t want. That way, we have time to catch up.

Both Georgina and Jane dress themselves up nicely and sit quietly smiling across from their husbands while the husbands eat. They feel the man should come home at the end of the day to a nice home, a warm meal and a beautiful wife among their possessions. Georgina feels nourished enough if she gets an approving stroke on her head from Edwin. Most of the time though, Mr. Thomas just tells her to go sit in the other room while he eats.

Of course, Liz has her very own signature etiquette. After serving Matthew a nice juicy steak with all the trimmings, she often gets under the table and finishes Matthew’s menu off with a dessert treat while he smokes a cigar.

I’m the only one who actually eats anything at the dinner table, most of the girls settle for something light in the kitchen afterwards, because our men think being thin is more important than being fed.

The Modern Vulgar Days of Tennis vs The Good Old Days of Tennis

Tuesday, June 28th, 2011

If you want a classic example of how femininity has lost its charm and….well, femininity, you need not look any further than the state of women’s tennis. I think it was Monica Seles who initiated the whole trend of the now de rigueur grunting on the court. Gone are the days of a breezy match where only the bounce of the tennis ball sailed from one set to another. These days you’d swear there was a pig farm next to the match, where pigs grunt and snort each time before, after, and during contact between the ball and anything else.

To drag the idea of sportsmanship through the mud, there are the athletes who – in their off time – double as shameless centerfold models in men’s magazines wearing outfits that are slightly wider than dental floss.

We always point the finger at men for being swine, but you have to inspect the veritable smorgasbord of garbage women are dangling in front of them.

As if that wasn’t enough, there are the outfits. This week, Serena and Venus Williams, two high priestess of gross sartorial violations have been eliminated from Wimbledon. Whoever thought of dressing like prostitutes to a classy game? Compare their sense of taste with the vintage days of women’s tennis:

Is it any wonder the serenity and quiet concentration of classic Wimbledon matches have been violently mauled to shreds by the Williams sisters? It’s true that they have held a long reign of championships. I won’t comment on their suspiciously hyper-testosterone physique. Along with the wins for the U.S. however, decades of ammo are literally handed to the international audience to view Americans as vulgar classless roughnecks, as Williams supporters coarsely roar and bawl words of encouragement ringside.

Who could forget when the notorious clip of Serena Williams threatening a line judge’s ruling with a “I Will KILL YOU!” If this is not the most boorish behavior in sports history, we can’t think of what is.

It’s not politically correct to say so, but we’ll be the first to say Thank god we can carry on with a quiet game at Wimbledon this year. A happy, hopefully enduring, treat to the days when tennis was a civilized sport which women dressed up properly and amused men with a game or two.

Miss America: The Importance of Modesty (update: May 12, 2010)

Monday, June 28th, 2010

Miss America 2010 in Lingerie

2010 Miss America hopeful Adrielle Churchill

Cringe ladies! Cringe!

Gone are the days of modest dressing, where men”s creativity was called upon to conjure up the sumptuous dreams of all that lies beneath.

Today, nothing is left to the imagination, as Miss America candidates bare all in recent lingerie shots. Is it further irony, perhaps a jeer towards tradition that they are presented in black and white photos? It”s not that we at the Stepfordwives Organization frown upon dressing suggestively. We do. Just in the privacy of our homes and for our husbands only. Why certainly not for the leers of the general public!

Witness, by comparison, 1957”s Miss America Marian McKnight. So delightful, charming, and demure. We should all be modest in public, because those were the days when ladies were ladies, and men were men!

Miss America 1957 Marian McKnight

2010 Miss America 1957 Marian McKnight